Erica vs. technology

I’ve never claimed to be particularly adept at technology.

Exhibit A: I once got into a mini-fight with my then-boyfriend over Tivo. He asked me to set Tivo before we went out to dinner. I tried, I really did. Tivo obviously hated me as evidenced by its refusal to work. Then-boyfriend said something along the lines of “Oh come on, it’s not that hard.” I threw the Tivo remote across the room. Stupid remote had too many buttons anyway.

Exhibit B: I have never owned an iPod. I did own a generic MP3 player that I won at a work Christmas party about five years ago. Actually, I won a personal DVD player but after partaking in a few drinks in the parking lot (It was a dry county and the party was in the high school cafeteria. We had to smuggle our liquor in. Good times.) a co-worker convinced me to trade him for the MP3 player. So that’s what a few vanilla vodka and diet cokes will get ya, my friends: a crappy MP3 player.

Exhibit C: My dad bought me a new flat-screen TV for my birthday this year. My birthday is in August. I still can’t figure out the TV. I don’t have DVR, it’s just regular cable. Except it’s not. There are seven channel 11s. 11-1, 11-2, 11-3….Who needs seven channel 11s?

And now, in the latest battle in the Erica vs. technology war, I am sad to report that once again, technology has won.

I went to the park to walk the other day. Although I still do not have an iPod, I do have an iPhone. (Work paid for it.) So I downloaded (uploaded?) some songs to my phone figuring I’d use the iPod feature and get a good workout while jamming to some cheesy late '90s/early '00s pop.

So imagine my frustration when I’ve get a good pace going, singing along with JC Chasez to Nsync’s “It’s Gonna Be Me” and bam! The song stops. (Coincidentally, that was also the moment I realized I was singing out loud. Oops, sorry fellow park-goers. Also, no judging because cheesy pop songs are the best to walk to.)

I slow my pace, pull the iPhone out of my pocket, give it a quizzical stare, and advance to the next song. About a minute in that song stops, too. After several minutes of standing in place and pushing at random buttons, I figure out the problem.

Clearly, my iPhone has decided all on its own that it isn’t going to play songs all the way through.

The only way I can make it play a full song is to manually select one song at a time from the list. Which means that about every 3 minutes and 24 seconds, I have to stop to change songs because I’m not coordinated enough to walk briskly and use my phone at the same time, thus completely defeating the purpose of getting in some good exercise. I gave up after two miles.

Technology: 1, Erica: 0

Epilogue: So I told a coworker, who does happen to be particularly adept at technology, the issue I was having with my phone and that I thought it was broken. He took the phone, changed one setting, and everything works again. Apparently, techonology only hates me.

I'm giving this blogging thing a go

I’m a recovering reporter, so I don’t write as much as I used to. I feel like all my one-liners, descriptive vocabulary words, and general creativity are fleeing from my brain faster than…hmmm…need an analogy… See? I got nothing.

So I decided to write again. Everyday. Just for fun and just for me.

But then I remembered one of my favorite parts of being a reporter: seeing my byline.

‘Cause after all, what’s the point of writing if no one can read it and tell you how good you are?

I’m kidding. Kinda. I do occasionally love to be the center of attention. When I was in college I used to joke that the world should be Erica-centric and revolve exclusively around me. The world didn’t take my suggestion, so I’m creating my own revolution.

Hence, my new blog: Ericacentric. It’s all Erica, all the time. Or rather, it’s all my random thoughts, wonderings, and opinions. And if you know me (which you would have to if you’re humoring me enough to read this) then you know that I have lots of those. I only hope they’re funny enough to keep you entertained.

Before you commit to reading what I have to say, I feel it’s my duty to at least let you know what kind of writer I am.

• I have a tendency to start every other sentence with the word “so”. So don’t say I didn’t warn you.

• When I took a creative writing class in college, my secret dream was to have at least one of my classmates deem my writing “wickedly funny”. Never happened. Jerks.

• I occasionally look up big words after I write them just to make sure I used them correctly in a sentence.

• I change names to protect the innocent, or the not so innocent as the case is more likely to be.

I told myself going into this that I would blog something, even if it’s just a fleeting thought, everyday. At least that way, even if no one reads it, I would have a daily diary of my life that I can look back on when I’m old and gray and remember “that one time when”… But then I realized that I’m pretty good at starting strong and fading fast (insert your own ‘that’s what she said’ joke here), so I make no promises of how often this will be updated.

So that’s it. Start revolving around me.

Or at least read a couple entries before you get bored and move on. Then lie to me and tell me you read it everyday. I’ll take that, too.